The 10 Commandments of Prison According to Orange is the New Black

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We’re big fans of Netflix’s original series Orange is the New Black. It’s ridiculous, shocking, depressing, hilarious, over-the-top and guaranteed to entertain. You just never know what’s coming next.

Seeing as how show creator Jenji Kohan is also the woman behind the way-more-violent-but-equally-entertaining Weeds, I’m not surprised how much Allie and I love Orange is the New Black.

If you’re unfamiliar with the show, it’s loosely based on a true story.  Cute blonde regular gal Piper Chapman is sentenced to 15 months in prison for a crime she committed in her youth and finally fessed up to. Nothing violent, just your average drug-smuggling. She, of course, is engaged and needs to leave her supportive fiancé (Jason Biggs from the American Pie series) for her new home at Litchfield Penitentiary.

A mix of crazies, bullies and lovers, Orange is the New Black is just all-around fascinating. I love the writing. I adore the characters (even the really scary ones). And the acting is totally top notch. Heck, I used to despise Kate Mulgrew when she was the Captain on Star Trek: Voyager, but as the red-headed Russian inmate Red, she’s one of my favorite characters.

I’ve also learned a lot from watching this series. In fact, based on episodes from the first three seasons, I put together a foolproof list of prison commandments. Should you ever unfortunately find yourself incarcerated, follow these to the letter or fear some serious retribution.

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#OITNB

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14 Responses
  • Cami v
    August 13, 2015

    I love this show.. what an awsome post 🙂

  • Sandy Cain
    August 6, 2015

    Hey, you forgot sucking up to the C/Os. It’s the only way to get anything done..done a trip to the Infirmary if you;re really sick, or to get a different roomate if your’s is a little too “friendly”. Come on, Andrew…..I know what I’m talking about, know what I mean??? (And oh…boo-hoo…sentenced to 15 months)

  • Debbie Warila
    August 2, 2015

    I absolutely adore “Orange Is the New Black” — in fact, I think I’m addicted to it, lol. Thanks for the review, and by the way, I LOVE the candles with the characters on them…very, very cool.

    • Andrew Kardon
      August 2, 2015

      I know! Those candles are so cool. I’m so jealous of the other bloggers who got ’em!!!

  • Salvador C.
    July 30, 2015

    Those candles would make cool little souvenirs. If only someone did make them.

    • Andrew Kardon
      August 2, 2015

      They really did make them, Sal. But only for use as promotional gifts for some bloggers.

  • Michelle S
    July 28, 2015

    I have not watched the series and didn’t know much about it until now. I may give it a whirl! Actually the title of the post caught my eye because my husband works in a prison.

    • Andrew Kardon
      August 2, 2015

      Oh, then you guys should definitely watch it so you can tell us how over-the-top ridiculous the show is! 🙂

  • LyndaS
    July 27, 2015

    That was my guilty pleasure. “Was” because I have run out of episodes to watch. 🙂
    I like your list, by the way.
    LyndaS recently posted..My Sweet Home AlabamaMy Profile

    • Andrew Kardon
      July 27, 2015

      It’s still our guilty pleasure since we’re only about halfway through Season 3. 🙂

  • Tiffany Cruz
    July 27, 2015

    I watched this for most of the day yesterday on and off. Love OITNB. Great post Andrew.
    Tiffany Cruz recently posted..Live like a local at The Creole Gardens Guesthouse Bed and Breakfast in New OrleansMy Profile

    • Andrew Kardon
      July 27, 2015

      Hey Tiffany! Thanks for the kind words. It is such a great show, isn’t it???

  • DJ
    July 27, 2015

    I love this show! These candles are great!

    • Andrew Kardon
      July 27, 2015

      They are pretty cool, DJ, aren’t they? Netflix actually sent real candles like that to some of their #StreamTeam members! Sadly, I didn’t get any. Sniff.

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